This is sort of a long chapter. This isn’t the best part of the story, but it’s setting up for later, and I promise they’ll be getting off the train soon! OR MAYBE THEY WON’T! THIS IS A TRAIN FROM HELL! HAHAHAHA! Ok, no it’s not. They’ll be getting off the train soon. I promise this will get better, at least, sooner or later. R&R for me. Thanks!

quick disclaiming reminder so I don’t get sued: Ducks are Disney’s, Maya and Terri are the original characters of Victory Thru Tears and Star at www.queertet.com, and the characters you don’t meet until later are mine.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

Chapter 5: I Wouldn’t Do That

Adam’s POV

     Maya’s looking for me. I know she is. I don’t want her to find me. I’m crying. I hate crying…it shows weakness. I guess I am an emotionally weak person sometimes. I’m not bawling, sobbing, hysterically crying mind you. Just silent tears and sniffles that come a lot lately. Sometime they come for no reason. When they do, it’s usually late at night when I’m all alone and thinking about how must my dad is counting on me, or how much my brother hates me. My brother beats me from time to time. I’m not really sure why. My dad and mom don’t know about it. If they ask about the bruises I tell them I got them playing hockey. They don’t think my brother would do something like that. He’s perfect in their eyes…and he’ll only beat me up worse if I say anything. I never cry while my brother is hitting me, but later at night, when I’m alone, I do.

     Unlike during my beatings though, this time the tears just flow freely. I’m not in the dark and I’m not alone. I’m sitting in a half filled car, looking at the landscape. How could Charlie accuse me of betraying the Ducks? I love them. They’re my family. I’ll never leave them…hell, playing on Varsity was an opportunity many hockey players would give their teeth for, and I still went back to the Ducks. I can’t figure out why, but I’m just not ready to let them go yet, even for a shot at professional hockey. The pro scouts watch the Eden Hall Varsity Warriors. Then I come back to have Charlie blow up at me all the time? He’s my best friend, and I don’t understand why he gets so mad at me. I mean, this whole thing is NOT my fault. I am not out to screw my friends and betray the Ducks. I just wouldn’t. They mean too much to me.

     “Adam, Adam!” I hear a girl’s voice. Uh-oh. Maya’s found me. She sits down in the seat next to me and wraps her arms around my shoulders. This girl is one of my best friends now. I love her and all, but I hate anybody seeing me like this. I wipe the tears from my eyes and turn to face her.

     “What’s up, Maya?” I ask in my calm, neutral, everyday, everything’s fine, tone. She doesn’t fall for it. I guess over freshman year we’ve gotten closer than I thought.

     “You ok?” she asks me.

     “Am I ok? AM I OK!? YEA, I’m great, my best friend just accuses me of betraying him, hurting my feelings worse than I ever thought possible. Plus, we’re stuck on a train heading for a big city where we could get lost or mugged murdered! Yeah, everything is wonderful!” Those are the words that are echoing in my head. What comes of my mouth is, “I’m fine.”

     She doesn’t buy it. “No, you’re not. I know you’re not.”

     “How do you know that?”

     “Because, generally, people don’t cry for no reason while they’re alone, looking out the window of a train.” She had seen me crying. Dammit! I turn away from her again. “Adam, Charlie didn’t mean those things he said. He was just angry,” she explained in a quiet voice with a sympathetic tone.

     “Yeah, I know….but why is he always mad at me?” I ask.

     “I…don’t know,” she says softly.

     “And another thing…if he doesn’t mean it, and I know it, why does it hurt so much?” I look straight at her. Maya has an answer for this one.

     “Because he’s your best friend, and whether he means what he says or not, you care what he thinks.”

     We sit in silence for a few minutes. Charlie is my best friend, and what Maya says makes sense…Maya…Maya and Terri…they’ve become part of the Ducks in a way. Not on the ice- hell, Terri is the anti-athlete- but they hang with us off the ice. Pretty much all the Ducks are cool with them. Not best friends, but they get along. Actually, the Ducks got along with them right off for a number of reasons. The main one being the month of detention we all served.

     In the middle of the prank war, which continued even after I rejoined the Ducks and we beat the Varsity, Connie made friends with Terri in art class. Connie explained what was going on through a bunch of different conversations, and Terri, being the purple psycho she can be sometimes, decided she and Maya could help us out with our next prank. So 4 cans of pink pain, 3 pounds of chocolate syrup, 4 jars of honey, 12 cans of shaving cream, 16 water balloons, 100 yards of string, 28 eggs, 6 cardboard boxes, 7 tomatoes, 1 rubber chicken, 9 feet of rope, 2 cups of vegetable oil, 700 rubber bands, 1 rubber ducky, 3 whoopee cushions, 2 pounds of feathers, 3 tubes of green dye, 2 ceiling fans, 1 plunger, an old tire, and one VERY messy Varsity dorm later, the Ducks, plus Terri and Maya, found themselves landed in detention for two hours after school everyday for a month. Apparently, a neon pink room with rope, feathers, honey, ceiling fans, and a huge bucket of chocolate syrup with eggs and green dye that falls on Kyle Reilly when he opens his door isn’t very funny and deserves punishment.

     Fortunately for the Ducks, the teacher who was supposed to sit with us for the detention would show up, take attendance, and leave. We could have left, but we decided it wasn’t smart in case somebody came by to check up on us, so we sat there and talked for 2 hours, mostly about the looks on everyone’s faces as water balloons or tomatoes were shot at them by an ingenious rubber band invention Averman came up with. And you should have seen the look on Cole’s face when he saw the tire coming at him after he pulled the rubber ducky...

     Coach Orion wasn’t thrilled with the whole thing, but when he looked at the polaroids Kenny Wu had snapped…well, even he couldn’t keep a straight face. Bombay, who’d married Charlie’s mom Casey after she divorced from Jack, the shmuck who was Charlie’s stepfather and her second husband, was proud of us.

     “I’m not your coach, so we can laugh about this,” he said, “28 eggs? I taught you kids well.” Yep, Terri and Maya were definitely members of the group after that… Maya’s voice brings me back from my thoughts.

     “Adam, are you going to forgive Charlie? He’s going to apologize, you know. He always does.” As if on cue, Charlie and Terri waltz through the door and sit down in seats opposite Maya and me.

     “Banksie, I’m sorry I blew up at you. I know you didn’t cause this mess,” Charlie sounded sincere. In truth, I had forgotten about him blaming for that. I was so wrapped up in the “you betray your friends” accusations I wasn’t really thinking about the train. I turned away from him, to look out the window, where the countryside of some state was rolling by.

     “Come on Banks, I’m sorry about blaming you,” he said. I still don’t answer him. “Banks, I’m sorry,” he’s beginning to get impatient. I keep gazing out the window.

     “Banks,” he said, his voice rising and his temper getting the better of him, “I’m-“

     “Yeah, I know, you’re sorry for blaming me,” I say quietly, turning to face him. “And I accept you’re apology for that.”

     “Oh,” Charlie says, “then what’s the problem?” Dammit. My face is so readable sometimes.

     “Nothing,” I lie.

     “Come off it,” he snapped. “I said I was sorry for blaming you. You accepted. Now what the hell is the problem?”

     “You don’t get it, do you!?” I explode. Maya looks shocked at my sudden outburst and I notice Terri catch herself before she slips off her seat in surprise. I continue, “I don’t care if you blame for getting us stuck on this train! I don’t care if you blame me for getting us trapped into heading towards New York! That’s not what I’m angry at!”

     “Then what is it?” Charlie asks me quietly, looking in sad anger at the ground, and I immediately regret yelling.

     I feel a lump in my throat, like I’m going to cry again. I can’t cry here, now. I swallow the lump, and in my quiet, calm tone, I say, “I’m upset because you accused me of screwing my friends- betraying the Ducks. After everything that’s gone on the past six years, I though you’d have learned I wouldn’t do that. I never could…my best friends, my family almost….how could you even think I would do that to the Ducks- to my best friends?” I feel the lump again, and stop. To my surprise, Charlie looks up and his angry face softens.

     “Banks,” he started, “I know you wouldn’t. You’ve always been a true, loyal duck. It sounds corny, but it’s the truth. I am sorry for even suggesting that. I say things I don’t mean, you know that. I thought the fact I was sorry for that comment went without saying. But if you want to hear it, I’m sorry I accused you of betraying us, Adam. I know you wouldn’t do that to us. I didn’t mean it. I’m sorry.” His words were so sincere and soft that I didn’t know what to do but accept his apology.

     “Yeah, you’re forgiven,” I say quietly.

     “Wow, that was easy….why didn’t I have to grovel and plead with you, Banks? That was so simple, even if I did mean every word. I thought it was harder than that.”

     “What was I gonna do?” I answered. “Not talk to you ever again? That would be stupid on my part, since best friends are hard to come by.”

     “Yeah, Cake-Eater, it would be,” he smiles. We both sit there, grinning like idiots.

     “So, anybody hungry?” Terri asks, breaking the not-so-awkward silence. I had nearly forgotten she and Maya were there. They hadn’t said anything. I guess they know better than to get between Charlie Conway and Adam Banks when they’re coming to blows.

     “Yeah, I am,” Maya says.

     “Starving,” Charlie agreed. I’m hungry too. I check my watch. 6:00 PM! No wonder we’re all hungry, we haven’t eaten since 10:30 this morning! I tell them that.

     “Well, Charles and I were in a bar/dining car before. We could head back there.”

     “Sounds good, Theresa,” Charlie replies. I stopped for a split second to wonder why Charlie never blows up at Terri. He hates being called Charles. He hates it, and yet, he never gets angry with her. If it were me, they’d be digging my grave. I sigh a little.

     “Come on,” Terri interrupts my thoughts. “I saw the Bash Brothers conked out on the way to this car. Let’s wake them up, tell them the good news, and grab a bite to eat.”